I Wonder If He’s Going To Say “This Is No Zaku Boy No Zaku”
Moetan begins with a man named Arks Sheldart, Elbyas about to be tried for unknown crimes, but breaking out and getting chased by a man who looks like Ramba Ral from Mobile Suit Gundam…..
Summary: Meanwhile Ink is getting her lunchbox and heads off to her boyfriend Nao-Kun’s house. Ink however is really nervous, short and childlike, so has trouble screwing up the courage to ring his doorbell.
One bugout and Ink daydream fantasy (wherein she imagines herself about to enter University with Nao. That’s right despite looking about 8 years old, Ink is in fact a highschool senior) later as Nao’s loli sister Miu comes out the door, Ink screws up the courage to ring his doorbell (fists clenched, determination, Loli style doorbell ringing), unfortunately he has already left and when she tries to chase him down she trips. Hearing his name called Nao turns around, but can’t see Ink since she’s so low to the ground.
Bizarro Brian Peppers
Not to worry as a pedophile comes by to help Ink up, but is promptly scared off by an approaching cop. (not before utterring the sentence “We’ll Meet Again, Pretty Girl! Baby!” though) Anyway, the cop says Ink should have a cheerful face on like the elementary school student she is, causing her to grumble that she’s a high school student. (this is a recalling theme for lolicon’s enjoyement and fantasy fullfillment)
In school Ink’s friends are teasing her about her constant pratfalls and they call Nao over who give her a bandaid (causing her to spaz a bit) and tells her she needs to grow up. (in more way’s than one) When class starts we learn that Ink got the top grade on the English exam, but Nao just seems to be dozing off during lecture (which Ink giggles about).
Eve From Black Cat’s Third Coming!
In Phys Ed class we see that Ink is a dunce however, and after taking a dodgeball to the face another loli-high school girl named Sumi comes up and upon being called Sumi-Chan proceeds to throw dodgeballs at Ink…..
Mandatory Butt Shot, More Of These To Come
This is broken up when Ink’s normal sized friends who teased her earlier call the spat another elementary school girl fight, causing the Ink and Sumi to focus their ire on the two. (See reccurring theme) After school Ink asks Nao to walk home with her, but Nao is worried about his dismal exam results and Ink realizes that her dream of going to the same college as Nao will remain that unless something is done.
You’re Also The EYECATCH!
The Legend Begins Very Soon
Ink goes to pray at a shrine for Nao’s entry into University and as she’s doing this a Duck falls out of the sky, looks up her skirt and get’s punched by a spiked knuckles wearing Ink in rapid succession. (loli’s are vicious beasts aren’t they) Anyway, when Ink points out that the duck is talking, it asks where the duck is, so Ink pulls out a mirror (which she just happened to have on her person somewhere), causing the duck to faint and a guilt ridden Ink to take it home. Back at Ink’s house the duck introduces itself as Arks (SURPRISE!) and insists that Ink needs to become a magical girl in order to help people (namely him, as in get him back to human form. His situation is quite similar to Tsuwa’s in Nanatsuiro Drops, only this Duck is a Real D*CK) and a reluctant Ink ultimately decides to do it to help Nao.
Ummmmm….. I Wouldn’t Say That Until AFTER You’ve Seen The Costume
Dangerous Levels Of New Energy Source Lolimoetron Z Detected!
Arks hands Ink a “Magical Phone” and tells her to create her own henshin code. Ink shouts out a phrase that sounds more like a Sentai Transformation Line and an irritated Arks tells her that her phrase needs to be more Cute and Lovely. So….MAGICAL CHANGE! Now begins a sequence that deserves nothing short of a video, but since I can’t do that I hope some highlight pictures will suffice:
Barely Legal In More Ways Than One
Moetan Is Born, but there’s still more service to be had:
Maybe You Should Have Waited Before Saying You Weren’t Going To Be Embarassed. Arks Seems To Love It Though
Told People That Lolimoetron Z does indeed exist
I Don’t Know What Scares Me More, The Fact That She’s Blushing And Looking Harmless, Or The Fact That This Light Tap Slap Sent Arks Flying Into A Window Leaving A Huge Dent. I Guess Loli Power Means Super Strength As Well
Moetan’s first task is to go help Nao-Kun, who Arks says out loud must be her boyfriend. This causes Moetan to go into blush mode and level Arks with a light tap (not joking either). Well Arks says they should be going (“Now Come On I Say” in english, which Kedex has translated as “No Problem”, but I know better) and that it’s time for magical flight. This means Ink inputting a code into Ragin Heart….er I mean her Lolipop wand to summon a pair of Butt Wings. (And to all those loli haters out there, it works, so pipe down)
This Is Clearly A Kanon Reference
A short flight later Moetan slams into Nao an butt scoots the rest of the way in to his room, leaving him standing bewildered.
Painful Or Pleasurable. You Decide
Moetan, is promptly tossed out as a strange girl, but Moetan insists she’s here to teach Nao English. After a brief sequence where Nao opens and closes the door on her a few times, causing her to pout as it closes and perk up when it opens, Nao accepts her help, knowing he needs any help with English he can get. After an indeterminate amount of Moetan sitting close to Nao and helping him study (this is like the ultimate fantasy of many an english challenged otaku I’m willing to bet time we hear Moetan translate a lin for Nao as “Do Yo Thin Tha Magica Galsu Loo Tha Say Even Afta De Transfo” (hmmm… her english is poor, I guess the point reall is the loliservice then)
That’s No Zaku Boy! NOOOOOO ZAKU!
That Engrish gem is followed by, “I Go Epeeso Twel Fo Dat. Do You Want To Copy It?” (Much better that time). Anyway Moetan’s time with Nao is cut shot when Arks goes on a bender showing all of Nao’s erotic collectibles to Moetan, causing Nao to get embarassed and kick them both out, telling them to never come back.
So Now I’ll Let People See Me Naked!
The episode ends with Ink chilling in a bath, recounting her bizarre day…but wait…
Challenge! A New Rival
Now We Get The Ending.
Thoughts: Wow! This series makes no pretensions on the fact that it’s for Loli Fanservice and Otaku enjoyment through and through, but it’s combination of outstanding animation this first episode and genuine fun makes it a surefire winner in my eyes. I feel like I’ve watched 8 episodes of content already, but I keep snapping back to reality and remembering this is only the first episode. Ink-Chan is a lolicon’s fantasy, Sumi-Chan is crazy, and now we have a new rival on the horizon similar to Nanatsuiro Drops first episode ending. In fact, a lot of things regarding the plot and characters and plot are similar, only Moetan is far more edgy, fun, comical and amusing in the long run. As such I think I will sub Moetan in for Nanatsuiro Drops for my magical girl blogging purposes, that is unless I catch word that people want me to talk about both. Ultimately, the first episode of Moetan was the best first episode of any summer series I’ve seen thus far, and the second one can’t come soon enough.
Rating: Nine Out Of Ten