Moetan Episode 4 The Return Of The Magical Girl


Nobody, But Nobody Calls Her Chicken

Yes!  Finally a new sub for Moetan, which means  I can finally start blogging it again since I don’t like to blog unless I can get all the details.  This time we get a new girl in the form of a pop idol named Alice Shiratori…..who of course is more than she appears to be. Read on….

Summary: The episode begins with Alice nailing the third spot on the charts, but being discouraged that it isn’t the number one spot.  At Ink’s house she’s also disappointed, but because she missed her favourite idols appearance.  Arks comments that he thought idols were supposed to have large breasts (He’s confusing Gravure Idols with Pop Idols).  Furthermore, according to Arks, apparently large breasts also cause global warming and cause the land to sink (Now you know and knowing is half the battle, G.I Joe).  For this reason (here it comes) small breasts (oooooohhhh *quivering with anticipation) are beneficial to the world, and thus Ink should cherish hers. (First she’d have to have a pair, and second…….man does this series keep coming up with intriguing pro-lolicon inferences).


You Wouldn’t Like Her When She’s Angry

Ink agrees, but then realizes the perversion behind the comment and deals punishment.  (This works so well with Yukari Tamura’s voice it’s scary.  I think I like this woman behind the Ink and Nanoha)

At Sumi’s place she’s sleeping in again so the maid has to wake her up by whispering some evil demonic stuff.  It works and Sumi bolts up trying to use her Face Flash. (Ummm…er….The Flash Symbol Ahoge????)  Today is an auspicious day and Sumi is going to Moe Tree Park (It’s actually called that) to see the Alice show with “Someone who is a lot cuter than her” according to the maid. (Sumi is also now wearing shorts and a t-shirt for maximum lolicon appeal)  At the park Sumi and Ink bump into each other amid a group of fat slobby men with glasses…..only to find out that Alice isn’t coming after all. (Awwwwww!)


Anything Ink Can Do Sumi Can Do Better


Alice Knows that Moe Is An Anagram For Emo

Just then the trouble alert sounds and off Ink and Sumi go to transform (with a drooling Arks who just can’t help himself apparently).  They fly off to somewhere, but before we can see that, a scene showing Alice bathing and talking about time starting to move occurs (she also seems to have a depressed bunny as her familiar).


Actual Screenshot Of Ink Blocking The Screen.  You Have To Wonder Just How Far Over Line The Episode 06 Goes If This Is Before It.  Feels Like I’m Watching A Hentai For About 3 Solid Seconds.

Ink and Sumi conduct a crash landing at a Kindergarten School (On top of each other in a Yuri pose, and if you’re expecting a picture I have a strict no yuri policy that prohibits me from posting such things) and Arks points out that crying little girls are running out of the school (Leave em alone Arks).  Apparently some guy ran into the school a little while ago and troubles afoot.


Today’s Thumbnail Collage Is Brought To You By Pastel Ink Crash Landing On The School Grounds To Save The Day.  Maybe Someday You’ll Get Lucky And This Will Happen At Your School.  Not Likely….

Sure enough, in the school Pastel Ink and Tempera Sumi find a perverted disgusting fat slob who just got back on a trip from Akihabara.  Tempera Sumi tries to socialize with him (as if it were a hostage negotiotation), but when the pervert gets to friendly and pulls out his limited edition lolicon figurine, the two commence with punishment.  Apparently the trouble alert was for something else however, and from underground erupts a giant octopus with underwear on its head (how original).  Nearby on top of a roof Alice intends to get in on the action.


EYECATCH! Spoken In A High Pitched Voice (This Image Reminds Me Of A Minmay Pose From Macross: Do You Remember Love?)


EYECATCH!  Spoken In A Much Deeper Voice.  This Is A Shot Of Alice Bathing And Reminds Me Of A Girl Bathing.

Under attack, Tempera Sumi imagines the horrible things the octopus might do to her. 


What Happens To Japanese School Girls In Hentai? 

As the octopus starts swiping, Pastel Ink learns from Arks that it’s speciality is to absorb magic.  Well looks like the girls are screwed, but remember what happens when magical girls are in trouble, suddenly from out of a nowhere, a rose strikes the octopus….it’s….


Tuxedo Kamen?

Dandee, who Ink seems to be developing a bit of a crush on or so it would seem.  Guess what,


Da Qiao and Xiao Qiao from Romance Of The Three Kingdoms Are Extremely Moe”.  Good to know.

Too bad just when Dandee is about to help he is chased off by the cop, and even Tempera Sumi is starting to wonder what is up with the pair (sweat drop ahoge).  Uh oh, now the octopus has Sumi in a hold (The Letter H ahoge).  The only thing that can save her is the perverted guy from before darting out and doing a belly flop on top of the octopus.


The Two Share A Newtype Like Connection

The Pervert embarks some wisdom on Arks before appearing to self destruct, and Arks pulls an Amuro, like when he witnessed Lalah’s death (See Mobile Suit Gundam Encounters In Space) but Pastel Ink explains to Ark that while he’d been daydreaming the heroic event, the sidestory became so exciting as to make the octopus explode (this series has the most random series of events imaginable).  Meanwhile, Alice has witnessed the gathering of heroes from atop a building nearby and phases out abruptly (Time Idol and what not).

Later that night Ink is moping about the bad day she had and noticing the time rushes off to Nao’s house for his nightly english lesson.  Meanwhile as Pastel Ink flies off, Alice is waiting in the street and for the first time we get to see her transformation:


Alice’s Transformation Is A Lot More Of A Traditional Magical Girl Transformation.  Aside From The One Butt Show It’s Fairly Short And To The Point, A Stark Contrast To The More Servicey Ink And Sumi Transformations.  It’s Quite Unique For The Series



Arks senses a presence and flies out into the sky to be confronted by Alice who says Arks needs to be made to pay for his sins.  Alice’s attack is relentless and in his transformed state, Arks is pretty much helpless.  Luckily Pastel Ink has returned, having forgotten something and notices Arks is gone.  Corned Arks thinks he’s done for and as Alice is going in for the killing blow……Pastel Ink lands on him crushing him flat.


Is Arks Experiencing Pain Or Pleasure, You Decide

Alice tells Pastel Ink she isn’t her enemy, but to prepare herself, but suddenly Alice falls to the ground.  She phases back to her house where she and the extremely jittery Rabbit or Dog thing (That is worried about her state) talk about how things will be fine.


Same Here

At Nao’s Pastel Ink imparts some wisdom on her, but he eventually puts on the Alice program, saying he thinks that Alice is cute.  Pastel Ink inquires and he says he thinks she’s cute too, causing her to turn beat red.

Back home Arks wonders if Alice sent the octopus after them.  He says that she seems to have something to do with his case in the Magic Kingdom, and they’ll have to be careful and Ink is told by her mother that it’s okay to take a bath (Arks drools a little).  Back at the studio the episode ends with Alice remarking ever cryptically that “Once things start to move they can’t be stopped”.’

The Kirbyesque song in the ending is handled by Alice-chan this time, as is Moetan Corner.  Next to Moetan, only Lucky Star has such unique endings, although whereas Lucky Star had a new song every episode, Moetan has a new video every episode.  Though it’s anyones guess if Moetan is going to start featuring live-action videos of Arks VA dancing around like a baffoon.


I Wonder If Alice’s House Is The Moe Tree Of Moe Tree Park…. I Just Can’t Get Over The Fact That There’s A Place In Moetan That’s Actually Called Moe Tree Park


Out Of All The Girls, Alice Actually Has The Best English Speaking Voice

Thoughts:  This episode started off really goofy, and I think I’m inclined to say something about the level of Lolicon fanservice.  Like Lucky Star and it’s Haruhi stuff, this type of content doesn’t really draw in many new viewers or those who aren’t likely to already be watching anyway, given the nature of the Moetan Audio CD’s and like Lucky Star it’s more likely to draw ire from those who are waffling (Doubters in Kyoani-Fanboyese) or already dislike Lolicon content.  So I think they shouldn’t be pushing this in peoples face so hard, from my end at least as a person who isn’t bothered by it.  It just strikes me as in poor taste, again not that it detracts from the show in my eyes, but that it might put off others.

Overall this episode is my favourite thus far, with it’s continued bizarre humour, the introduction of the intriguing and more mature Alice, who is definitely more adept magically, as well as just plain more vicious, then the other girls, and a new layer to the plot of Arks trial.  Everything clicked with me so there’s not much to complain about at all.  I hope to learn a bit more about what Alice’s story is, why she is after Arks and what all her babbling about linear time means (Ok this might actually be a joke about cliche dialogue, but if it’s not it could be important to the plot).  Actually one minor drawback in this episode is that it was a bit light on my favourite character Sumi this time around.  I can’t get enough of this character, her Super Robot/Sentai quotes and the seemingly limitlessly expressions her ahoge can make, that if you aren’t quick (like the visual gags in Naked Gun), you’ll miss the context and joke of.  As Alice said, now that the cast is assembled things should start to move, so bring it on.  Unfortunately though it may be some time until I can watch and blog another Moetan episode (unless the subtitle releases pick up speed), so I hope people enjoyed this one, as it may be the last one for a while.

Rating: Nine And A Half Out Of Ten


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