Masters Series: How To Make An Anime With The Studios

Tonight we gather here ladies and gentlemen to see each of our favourite studios show off their popular recipes for making an anime.  On hand today we have J.C Staff, Sunrise, Kyoto Animation, Shaft, Gonzo, BONES and ufoTABLE to show off what is believed to be their recipes for keeping us, the anime fans entertained.  Without further hesitation let us get started….

J.C Staff Souffle:

  • 1 Time Slot To Start
  • 3 Cups Of Lolis To Form The Character Foundation
  • Add 1 Sponsor (Preferrably Konami) For Funding
  • Allow Sponsor A Steak In The Finished Product
  • 1 Pinch Of Loli Fanservice
  • If Making More Than 1 Souffle, Don’t Put As Much Effort Into The Preparation Of The Second One.
  • Serve First Dish At Room Temperature And Second Dish Ice Cold

Sunrise Eye Candy:

  • 1 Time Slot To Start
  • Split Time Slot Into Two Halves
  • Take Any Concept To Act As Base
  • Add One Cup Of Mecha To Concept
  • Add 3/4 Of Handsome Men And 1/4 Of Sultry Females To A Side Bowl And Mix Until It Forms Into An Interconnected Solid Mass
  • Add Characters Mass To Base
  • Add One Jason Miao To The Judge Panel To Call It A Trainwreck
  • Add About 1 Million Yen Overbudget For Each Of The 50 Pieces Of Candy
  • Make Sure To Have The Longest Time Between Serving Each Sunrise Eye Candy Until Dining Guests Are Salivating And Ready To Kill You For More

Kyoto Animation Chocolate Moesplosion:

  • Choose Any Material With A Large Concentration Of Cute Female Characters To Act As A Rectangular Base
  • Add 5 Cups Of Animation
  • Add A Pinch Of Lense Flares
  • Add 1 Cup Of Slapstick Comedy To The Leftmost Quarter Of The Base
  • Add 1 Cup Of Melodrama To The Right Most Quarter Of The Base
  • Add 2 Cups Of Haruhi Suzumiya To The Centre Portion Of The Base
  • Take Reservations With Money Down And Serve

Shaft Shinbo Special:

  • Take Any Material To Act As Base
  • Have Akiyuki Shinbo As Your Sous Chef
  • Stuff It With As Many References Possible
  • Cook On Maximum Heat Setting Until It Splits Apart
  • Serve

Gonzo Surprise:

  • Take Any Material To Act As A Base
  • Stuff It With Silicon
  • Have Trendy Musical Entertainment At Your Establishment
  • Add One Cup Of Animation For Dressing
  • Allow Computer To Automate Your Animation Selection Process
  • Allow Part Of Final Animation To Rot
  • Coat Your Base With Final Animation
  • Serve, But Be Sure To Prepare As Much As Possible

Bones Sampler:

  • Pick An Unusual Concept To Act As A Base
  • Add Two Cups Of Quirky Characters And Mix Until It Forms Into An Interconnected Solid Mass
  • Be Sure To Maximize On The Presentation Of Product
  • Add A Layer Of Intrigue That Slowly Breaks Away With Each Bite To A Sweet Gooey Centre Over Time
  • Have The Manager Come In Every Other Time You Prepare The Sampler To Shut Down The Preparation Before You Are Able To Put The Finishing Touches On It

ufoTABLE Cola:

  • Pick A Potentially Interesting Concept To Act As Base Flavour
  • Drown In Merchandise Syrup Until Flavour Of Original Concept Is Masked
  • Be Sure To Include Advertisements On Can
  • Serve Warm

And they we have it.  The contestants entrants are in, with a little side interpretation on how they were prepared by me (hope I got everything write).  Now it’s up to the fans to judge which concoction they like the best.

Shin Oikamas: Gimme Some Of That….

Kaioshin Sama: Yeah You Can Have Some Moesplosion In A Sec, Just Let Me Finish Here

Shin Oikamas: *Salivates*

Anyway, let us know what you think and don’t be afraid to be as critical as a needle.  Whatever the hell that’s supposed to mean.


2 Responses to “Masters Series: How To Make An Anime With The Studios”

  1. 1 Jakinbandw November 2, 2007 at 7:36 pm

    I’ll take one Sunrise Eye Candy please….

    I was just wondering if I could get it with extra plot?

  2. 2 IKnight November 2, 2007 at 11:35 pm

    Sunrise Eye Candy every time. I’m eagerly waiting to see if Gundam 00 will evade the Curse of Miao, but either way I’m guaranteed some well-written opinions.

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